Once upon a time there was a young man who was considered wise, but his wisdom was not his own. His wisdom came from the One above and from the Bible. He knew Ephesians 4:29 and did his best to always be an encouragement. He strove to follow 2 Timothy 2:14-16 by “avoiding worldly and empty chatter” and by “handling accurately the word of truth.” He contemplated James 3 and knew that no man could bride his tongue that it is a restless evil. This young man knew that through God’s power was the only way that he could control his tongue.
Slowly but surely this young man’s reputation grew. He started having deeper and deeper conversations with people. They started asking advice on more difficult subjects. He was a great encouragement to all he talked with. God was working through this man to bring other closer to Himself. All of this was not happening, because the young man was wise in himself. It was happening because he relied on God. During every conversation he was constantly praying about what he should be said next. He was listening to God and the person. He was trying to understand the depths of the problem. God often gave him eyes to see and ears to hear. These conversations were not about himself they were about showing God’s truth to the hurting.
Over and over the young man was surprised at the way God used him. He was surprised at the insight he was gaining into the heart of problems. He was surprised at the way God would give him the right words. He was thankful for being used by God to minister.
Slowly that thankfulness wore off and the young man started to think the wisdom was within himself. He became proud of his ability to help people solve their problems. As his pride grew, his ability dwindled. He started to rely on his own wisdom and on logic. No longer did he rely on God. He stopped praying during conversations and asking God what to say next. As he stopped praying he stopped being an encouragement.
At times he would remember that God is where his wisdom came from, and then he would encourage others. These instances have become less and less. His own logic ruled during conversations. He proceeded like this for a long while, but then God made him aware of his pride in this area. Once again He has started to rely on God. The cry of his heart became “Give me words to speak.”
As you may have guessed I am that young man. Pride is an issue that I have been dealing with for a long time and will continue to deal with it. God is working and breaking down that pride. Recently God has been showing me the pride I take in way I speak. He has also been showing me the importance of my words. I have been turning these things back over to Him and am trying to wait on him for what to say.
Please take a moment to look at 2 Timothy 2:14-16, Eph. 4:29, James 1:5, James 3, and Matthew 12:36-37 (see end of note/post).
Please, join with me and ask God to give you the words to speak. Let us try and only say things that are worthwhile and that will build each other up. This is what God has called us to.
To God be the glory forever and ever.
Your fellow servant of the Lord, Jesus Christ,
Titus
Matt 12:36-37 (NASB)
“But I tell you that every careless word that people speak, they shall give an accounting for it in the day of judgment."For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned."
2 Tim 2:14-16 (NASB)
Remind them of these things, and solemnly charge them in the presence of God not to wrangle about words, which is useless, and leads to the ruin of the hearers. Be diligent to present yourself approved to God as a workman who does not need to be ashamed, handling accurately the word of truth. But avoid worldly and empty chatter, for it will lead to further ungodliness,
Eph 4:29 (NASB)
Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment so that it will give grace to those who hear.
James 1:5 (NASB)
But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.
James 3:4-18 (NASB
Look at the ships also, though they are so great and are driven by strong winds, are still directed by a very small rudder wherever the inclination of the pilot desires. So also the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet it boasts of great things. See how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity; the tongue is set among our members as that which defiles the entire body, and sets on fire the course of our life, and is set on fire by hell. For every species of beasts and birds, of reptiles and creatures of the sea, is tamed and has been tamed by the human race. But no one can tame the tongue; it is a restless evil and full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God; from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be this way. Does a fountain send out from the same opening both fresh and bitter water? Can a fig tree, my brethren, produce olives, or a vine produce figs? Nor can salt water produce fresh. Who among you is wise and understanding? Let him show by his good behavior his deeds in the gentleness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your heart, do not be arrogant and so lie against the truth. This wisdom is not that which comes down from above, but is earthly, natural, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there is disorder and every evil thing. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy. And the seed whose fruit is righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.
March 25, 2009
March 19, 2009
What God has been teaching me
I would like to take a couple of minutes and write about a few of the things God has been teaching me lately.
On the 9th of March, I made a comment on one of my friend’s pictures. That comment started an argument that lasted two days. Each of us posted about twice a day. At the very end of the argument my friend made a comment that showed I had hurt her through me words. This caused me to stop and think. I wrote a quick, short, and not very heartfelt apology. I was sorry that I had hurt her, but I still felt like I was right. Within a couple of minutes of making this apology God started to work on my heart. After God had been operating on me for a while I wrote the following apology.
“I am sorry that we argued on facebook. After I left my last comment God showed me that I was wrong to press you. I should have just warned you and then left it at that. I am sorry that my pride has lead me once again to argue with you. God has been working on me but He is not finished yet. He showed me through this argument that I feel like I have to be right and that the person that I am talking to has to know it before the conversation is over. I am sorry that I was trying to force my views on to you. God is showing me that I need to be more graceful in those circumstances. If I have a differing opinion I should state it and leave it at that unless the person asks why I believe the way I do. I am sorry that I did not do this. I hope that you will forgive my stubbornness.”
Well, even now God is still working on my pride. As I sit and write this I have thoughts like “maybe people will read this and see how humble I am and how much better I am doing…” Pride is still strong within me, but God is working.
Fear is what God focused on next in my life. It started with a conversation with a friend. He helped me realize that I fear being alone, I fear rejection, and last of all I fear spending time with God. Also, my friend pointed out that God wants to help us overcome those fears and replace them with trust. He also said that normally this is not an easy process, but it is always worth it.
Right away God started to work on my fear of being alone. That fear actually stems from a couple of different fears. I fear being alone, because when I am alone I generally sink into a depressed state. I am afraid of that state. I don’t like the feeling also when I am depressed I make dumb mistakes. God has been taking that fear and He is showing me that I don’t have to be depressed when I am alone, because God is with me.
The last thing that God has been showing me over the past week comes from Malachi 1:6 which says “‘A son honors his father, and a servant his master, then if I am a father, where is My honor?’ And ‘if I am a master, where is My respect? Says the Lord of hosts to you, O priests…’” This verse caused me to ask myself the questions “Do I give God the honor and respect He deserves?” Also, “Do I respect my father the way I should?”
On the 9th of March, I made a comment on one of my friend’s pictures. That comment started an argument that lasted two days. Each of us posted about twice a day. At the very end of the argument my friend made a comment that showed I had hurt her through me words. This caused me to stop and think. I wrote a quick, short, and not very heartfelt apology. I was sorry that I had hurt her, but I still felt like I was right. Within a couple of minutes of making this apology God started to work on my heart. After God had been operating on me for a while I wrote the following apology.
“I am sorry that we argued on facebook. After I left my last comment God showed me that I was wrong to press you. I should have just warned you and then left it at that. I am sorry that my pride has lead me once again to argue with you. God has been working on me but He is not finished yet. He showed me through this argument that I feel like I have to be right and that the person that I am talking to has to know it before the conversation is over. I am sorry that I was trying to force my views on to you. God is showing me that I need to be more graceful in those circumstances. If I have a differing opinion I should state it and leave it at that unless the person asks why I believe the way I do. I am sorry that I did not do this. I hope that you will forgive my stubbornness.”
Well, even now God is still working on my pride. As I sit and write this I have thoughts like “maybe people will read this and see how humble I am and how much better I am doing…” Pride is still strong within me, but God is working.
Fear is what God focused on next in my life. It started with a conversation with a friend. He helped me realize that I fear being alone, I fear rejection, and last of all I fear spending time with God. Also, my friend pointed out that God wants to help us overcome those fears and replace them with trust. He also said that normally this is not an easy process, but it is always worth it.
Right away God started to work on my fear of being alone. That fear actually stems from a couple of different fears. I fear being alone, because when I am alone I generally sink into a depressed state. I am afraid of that state. I don’t like the feeling also when I am depressed I make dumb mistakes. God has been taking that fear and He is showing me that I don’t have to be depressed when I am alone, because God is with me.
The last thing that God has been showing me over the past week comes from Malachi 1:6 which says “‘A son honors his father, and a servant his master, then if I am a father, where is My honor?’ And ‘if I am a master, where is My respect? Says the Lord of hosts to you, O priests…’” This verse caused me to ask myself the questions “Do I give God the honor and respect He deserves?” Also, “Do I respect my father the way I should?”
February 27, 2009
Questions
Why do I keep making the same mistakes?
Why don’t I succeed?
Why do I do the things I do?
Why don’t I do what is right?
Does my life still have worth?
Does God still love me?
Does He still care?
Does He regret making me?
How much pain have I caused Him?
How many times do I have to try before I get it right?
How many times will I try to accomplish the impossible?
How many times will I fail?
How many times will I doubt?
When will I realize it is not up to me?
When will I realize I can’t do it myself?
When will I realize I need to trust Him?
When will I realize only through Christ I succeed?
Do I understand He has already forgiven me?
Do I understand the depth of His love?
Do I understand the work He did on the cross?
Do I understand…?
Will I give Him my life?
Will I surrender all?
Will I let Him work in me?
Will I love Him in return?
Stop and be still and know He is God
Stop and be still and know His unfailing love
Stop and be still and know His forgiveness
Stop and be still and know He is in control
Will you surrender all?
Will you slow and pounder His unfailing love?
Will you be still?
Why don’t I succeed?
Why do I do the things I do?
Why don’t I do what is right?
Does my life still have worth?
Does God still love me?
Does He still care?
Does He regret making me?
How much pain have I caused Him?
How many times do I have to try before I get it right?
How many times will I try to accomplish the impossible?
How many times will I fail?
How many times will I doubt?
When will I realize it is not up to me?
When will I realize I can’t do it myself?
When will I realize I need to trust Him?
When will I realize only through Christ I succeed?
Do I understand He has already forgiven me?
Do I understand the depth of His love?
Do I understand the work He did on the cross?
Do I understand…?
Will I give Him my life?
Will I surrender all?
Will I let Him work in me?
Will I love Him in return?
Stop and be still and know He is God
Stop and be still and know His unfailing love
Stop and be still and know His forgiveness
Stop and be still and know He is in control
Will you surrender all?
Will you slow and pounder His unfailing love?
Will you be still?
February 21, 2009
Saved by Grace
February 20, 2009
I was reading my DFD bible study today and it asked the question “Do you feel worthy of God’s grace?” I thought that is was a simple question with a simple answer. I don’t feel worthy of God’s grace and if I was worthy of it would it be grace? No, if I was worthy then it would be my just reward. In my head I know this is to be true, but at times my heat does not reflect that answer.
As some of you know I struggle with pride. That pride often leads me to think I am better than others. Whenever I am in that state I have forgotten that simple answer to the simple question. I am not worthy of God’s grace, because if I were it would not be grace. In 1 Corinthians 4:7 Paul says “For who makes you different from anyone else? What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as though you did not?” So when I boast I am taking glory that is due to God because He made me capable to do the very thing I am boasting about. In Ephesians 2:8-9 the bible says “For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast.” I really have nothing to boast about everything that I have God has given me, my abilities, my good grades, all my stuff, and most importantly my salvation.
When I feel like boasting I need to remember these facts. First, God has given me everything I have. Second, I have done nothing to earn my salvation it was a gift. And finally remember to glorify God. Paul said, “May I never boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ.”
I was reading my DFD bible study today and it asked the question “Do you feel worthy of God’s grace?” I thought that is was a simple question with a simple answer. I don’t feel worthy of God’s grace and if I was worthy of it would it be grace? No, if I was worthy then it would be my just reward. In my head I know this is to be true, but at times my heat does not reflect that answer.
As some of you know I struggle with pride. That pride often leads me to think I am better than others. Whenever I am in that state I have forgotten that simple answer to the simple question. I am not worthy of God’s grace, because if I were it would not be grace. In 1 Corinthians 4:7 Paul says “For who makes you different from anyone else? What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as though you did not?” So when I boast I am taking glory that is due to God because He made me capable to do the very thing I am boasting about. In Ephesians 2:8-9 the bible says “For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast.” I really have nothing to boast about everything that I have God has given me, my abilities, my good grades, all my stuff, and most importantly my salvation.
When I feel like boasting I need to remember these facts. First, God has given me everything I have. Second, I have done nothing to earn my salvation it was a gift. And finally remember to glorify God. Paul said, “May I never boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ.”
February 7, 2009
Thoughts on Psalm 46
Tonight I read Psalm 46. Many of you probably know Psalms 46:10 “Be still and know I am God.” The preceding verses talk about a bunch of terrible things that happen in life ranging from mountains collapsing to nations falling. The beginning of the chapter says not to fear because “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.” As a whole I believe this chapter is saying that when bad things happen we are to be still and know that the Lord is God. He is in control and will take care of us. We are not to worry or fear. We are to still our hearts, minds, and bodies and know that the He is God.
So tonight or right take some time and just be still and know that He is God.
I pray that you are able to trust God with whatever circumstance you are in. He is your strength and fortress. He cannot be shaken.
So tonight or right take some time and just be still and know that He is God.
I pray that you are able to trust God with whatever circumstance you are in. He is your strength and fortress. He cannot be shaken.
January 29, 2009
God Spoke
A little over a week ago I received a letter from a friend. God used this letter to bring me to a place of brokenness before Him. While reading the letter God spoke to me clearer than He ever has before, and what He said tore me apart.
The letter was a very encouraging one. It talked about how God had been working in my friend’s life and how she was continuing to submitting her life to Christ. This was an answer to my prayers. Her growth in Christ has been something I have been praying for. About half way through the letter I started to thank God for what He was doing and how He had answered my prayers. That is when I heard God speak to me. He said in a quiet and pained voice, “Titus, you have been neglecting me” and then after a short pause He asked, “Why?” Hearing God say that and hearing the emotion in his voice broke me. I felt terrible for the way I had treated Him, for choosing other things over Him, for creating idols in my life, and for just simply ignoring Him. I ignored Him in ways I never would ignore a friend. I was and am so ashamed of neglecting Him.
Why had I been neglecting God? Well, it is because I am afraid of something. What that something is I don’t know. I fear something God will ask me to do or something He will say no to. I don’t know what I fear. I am afraid of spending time with Him, afraid of what He will do, and of what He will think. I don’t understand my feelings. However, they are there and are keeping me from enjoying being in the presence of God.
Sunday at Church Mr. Pulver, who was leading worship, asked if anyone had something to share. Quite a few people shared different things. I don’t remember what they said I only remember God wanting me to share what He had told me. So after our last song I said, “I have something to share” I started off by reading James 5:16. As I read I had to bite back tears that where threatening to overwhelm me. Next, I started haltingly to tell the story of what God had said to me, and then I attempted to share the answer to God’s question “why.” I was unable to get through it all before I broke down completely and started to sob my body shaking. I was filled with grief over neglecting God and with shame for what I had done. Guilt plagued me. As soon as I could no longer talk Mr. Pulver asked everyone to get up and pray for me and my family. They stood around us and prayed.
As they were praying, God started to bring thing after thing that I need to confess to my attention. I sat and cried while my body shook quaked confessing things to God. Everyone probable prayed for us around fifteen or twenty minutes. I was unaware of the time passing just God, and the people praying for me. God was breaking my heart, humbling my proud spirit. That day He did a major work in me.
Right now, I am still full of shame for what I did. God has taken away my guilt. He has forgiven me and for that I am thankful. Still at times I am not far from tears, the sorrow and regret is still there. My heart is laying in pieces in God’s hands, which He is slowly putting back together.
One of the many things that God has showed me through all of this is that He truly values spending time with us. He really enjoys hanging out with us. He longs for an intimate relationship with each of us, a relationship in which we share life together.
The letter was a very encouraging one. It talked about how God had been working in my friend’s life and how she was continuing to submitting her life to Christ. This was an answer to my prayers. Her growth in Christ has been something I have been praying for. About half way through the letter I started to thank God for what He was doing and how He had answered my prayers. That is when I heard God speak to me. He said in a quiet and pained voice, “Titus, you have been neglecting me” and then after a short pause He asked, “Why?” Hearing God say that and hearing the emotion in his voice broke me. I felt terrible for the way I had treated Him, for choosing other things over Him, for creating idols in my life, and for just simply ignoring Him. I ignored Him in ways I never would ignore a friend. I was and am so ashamed of neglecting Him.
Why had I been neglecting God? Well, it is because I am afraid of something. What that something is I don’t know. I fear something God will ask me to do or something He will say no to. I don’t know what I fear. I am afraid of spending time with Him, afraid of what He will do, and of what He will think. I don’t understand my feelings. However, they are there and are keeping me from enjoying being in the presence of God.
Sunday at Church Mr. Pulver, who was leading worship, asked if anyone had something to share. Quite a few people shared different things. I don’t remember what they said I only remember God wanting me to share what He had told me. So after our last song I said, “I have something to share” I started off by reading James 5:16. As I read I had to bite back tears that where threatening to overwhelm me. Next, I started haltingly to tell the story of what God had said to me, and then I attempted to share the answer to God’s question “why.” I was unable to get through it all before I broke down completely and started to sob my body shaking. I was filled with grief over neglecting God and with shame for what I had done. Guilt plagued me. As soon as I could no longer talk Mr. Pulver asked everyone to get up and pray for me and my family. They stood around us and prayed.
As they were praying, God started to bring thing after thing that I need to confess to my attention. I sat and cried while my body shook quaked confessing things to God. Everyone probable prayed for us around fifteen or twenty minutes. I was unaware of the time passing just God, and the people praying for me. God was breaking my heart, humbling my proud spirit. That day He did a major work in me.
Right now, I am still full of shame for what I did. God has taken away my guilt. He has forgiven me and for that I am thankful. Still at times I am not far from tears, the sorrow and regret is still there. My heart is laying in pieces in God’s hands, which He is slowly putting back together.
One of the many things that God has showed me through all of this is that He truly values spending time with us. He really enjoys hanging out with us. He longs for an intimate relationship with each of us, a relationship in which we share life together.
January 6, 2009
Sharing from my Heart
Pride…..Fear of rejection……Fear that I will not say what needs to be said…… Uncertainty.… Disconnected….Shame…. These are the feelings that are flying through my heart… These have brought me to tears many times over the past couple of days.
Pride: within me saying “I don’t need God I can go through life without Him.” And “God does not mind if I don’t spend time with Him tonight. He will understand that I need some me time.” My pride has led me to follow these suggestions even when I knew them to be false.
Fear of rejection: Afraid to do what God wants me to do, because I am afraid that if I do what He wants, I will not be received the same way by someone I look up to greatly.
Fear that I will not say what needs to be said: God has asked me to talk with one of my friends about a topic that is very emotional. He has asked me to say something that my heart does not feel like saying but I know that it is the right thing to say. I fear that I will let my emotions rule during the conversation and will end up saying the wrong thing.
Uncertain of my future: I am not sure what God wants me to do over the next two years, and I need to make a decision within the next ten days. Where will I be going to college next fall? I am uncertain about the future and am unwilling to give it to God, because I feel disconnected.
Disconnected from God: a feeling that I have caused by deciding to do other things rather than spend time with my creator. I have made idols of those things be putting them before spending time with my Lord.
I am filled with shame because of this fact. I am very disappointed with myself, because I know that this disconnection is completely my fault. Also I know that if my relationship with God was in the right place then all of these troubles would not be causing me pain. I would have laid them at Jesus’ feet, but due to my pride I am unwilling to do this.
Thankfully shame is not where my journey ends. It is actually the beginning of a turning back to my Lord and Savior. Tonight (1-5-09) God has greatly blessed me by drawing me back to Himself. After a conversation with a friend and reading Psalms 58, 61, and James 4:1-10, God has started to humble my heart before Him once again. As of right now, I am still trying to lay all these things at his feet. I am still not where I should be, but I am moving in that direction.
James 4 speaks directly to my issue of pride as you can see below.
James 4:6-10
6But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble." 7Submit yourselves (A pride issue), then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 8Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. 9Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. 10Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.
Psalm 61 was a huge encouragement to me to. Specially the first four verses.
Psalm 61
1 Hear my cry, O God;
listen to my prayer.
2 From the ends of the earth I call to you,
I call as my heart grows faint;
lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
3 For you have been my refuge,
a strong tower against the foe.
4 I long to dwell in your tent forever
and take refuge in the shelter of your wings.
Selah
5 For you have heard my vows, O God;
you have given me the heritage of those who fear your name.
6 Increase the days of the king's life,
his years for many generations.
7 May he be enthroned in God's presence forever;
appoint your love and faithfulness to protect him.
8 Then will I ever sing praise to your name
and fulfill my vows day after day.
Pride: within me saying “I don’t need God I can go through life without Him.” And “God does not mind if I don’t spend time with Him tonight. He will understand that I need some me time.” My pride has led me to follow these suggestions even when I knew them to be false.
Fear of rejection: Afraid to do what God wants me to do, because I am afraid that if I do what He wants, I will not be received the same way by someone I look up to greatly.
Fear that I will not say what needs to be said: God has asked me to talk with one of my friends about a topic that is very emotional. He has asked me to say something that my heart does not feel like saying but I know that it is the right thing to say. I fear that I will let my emotions rule during the conversation and will end up saying the wrong thing.
Uncertain of my future: I am not sure what God wants me to do over the next two years, and I need to make a decision within the next ten days. Where will I be going to college next fall? I am uncertain about the future and am unwilling to give it to God, because I feel disconnected.
Disconnected from God: a feeling that I have caused by deciding to do other things rather than spend time with my creator. I have made idols of those things be putting them before spending time with my Lord.
I am filled with shame because of this fact. I am very disappointed with myself, because I know that this disconnection is completely my fault. Also I know that if my relationship with God was in the right place then all of these troubles would not be causing me pain. I would have laid them at Jesus’ feet, but due to my pride I am unwilling to do this.
Thankfully shame is not where my journey ends. It is actually the beginning of a turning back to my Lord and Savior. Tonight (1-5-09) God has greatly blessed me by drawing me back to Himself. After a conversation with a friend and reading Psalms 58, 61, and James 4:1-10, God has started to humble my heart before Him once again. As of right now, I am still trying to lay all these things at his feet. I am still not where I should be, but I am moving in that direction.
James 4 speaks directly to my issue of pride as you can see below.
James 4:6-10
6But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble." 7Submit yourselves (A pride issue), then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 8Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. 9Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. 10Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.
Psalm 61 was a huge encouragement to me to. Specially the first four verses.
Psalm 61
1 Hear my cry, O God;
listen to my prayer.
2 From the ends of the earth I call to you,
I call as my heart grows faint;
lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
3 For you have been my refuge,
a strong tower against the foe.
4 I long to dwell in your tent forever
and take refuge in the shelter of your wings.
Selah
5 For you have heard my vows, O God;
you have given me the heritage of those who fear your name.
6 Increase the days of the king's life,
his years for many generations.
7 May he be enthroned in God's presence forever;
appoint your love and faithfulness to protect him.
8 Then will I ever sing praise to your name
and fulfill my vows day after day.
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